Yesterday I shared about my journey about my weight gain and body image.
Today, I had some horrible sugar cravings again.
While in the 4th store looking for deodorant and listerine; ( my husband is a bit picky!) I was struck with a compulsion to buy lifesavers.
I was trying to convince myself that eating a roll of lifesavers would do me good; so I searched.
I couldn’t find a roll; but I did find a big ole bag. I took them off the shelf and I put them back on the shelf about 3 times.
Then I decided to search a little longer for that single lifesaver roll and entered Christmas Candy hell.
My eyes fell upon my childhood stocking stuffer dream: those lifesaver christmas packs that contained 5 or 10 rolls.
You had me at multi-pack
Again, I pick it up and started to rationalize that I would eat just one roll and throw the rest away.
Yet, this wasn’t my first trip to the lifesaver storybook pack rodeo. I knew that if I bought that pack that I would eat at least 3 packs.
I began to cry.
Yes, in the middle of the drug store I was crying and cursing that 10 pack for controlling my life.
I heard Delilah Dazzle told me to step away from the candy aisle. Delilah is my intuition. Yes I name her (judge if you must.)
I dried my eyes and walked away secretly hoping that a single lifesaver roll was waiting for me at the checkout counter.
It wasn’t.
As I slid into the car and grabbed onto the steering wheel; I surrendered my sugar craving.
I prayed for God to take it because I just couldn’t deal with it anymore.
Thankfully, he took my craving
Lifesavers are deadly for me. They trigger all kinds of good and bad childhood memories.
After I had regained my composure I asked Delilah: what was that about?
Your lack of faith makes you crabby and you are wanting sugar to sweeten you life.
Then she said: create those 10 commandments and your need for sweetness will disappear. She was right.
I created my 10 commandments and the sweetness is beginning to return. Here are mine:
1. I influence the scale; I don’t control. It holds no power over me.
2. I only wear clothes that honor my body as it is TODAY.
3. Fit trumps size everyday of the week. Both in health and in clothing.
4. When I eat I eat; When I read, I read and when I TV I TV
5. I eat when I am hungry and stop when I am satisfied.
6. I allow my gut to illuminate my life.
7.Hating my body only makes the scale tip up. To tip it down; I first love my body as it is today.
8. I welcome cravings as a gift that is providing vital information to my ongoing transformation.
9. Everyday I work towards mastering the art of slow down and savor.
10. Forgiveness and gratitude are the kindling to my metabolic fire.
Sista Chat time: I just revealed my struggle with food. Are you willing to share yours in the comments below so I can help you? Also, are you willing to create your own 10 commandments?